Thursday, February 16, 2006

That Man

For the 3rd time this week, I enjoyed a lunch date with PC. It says something to me that he keeps managing to swing by for lunch to see me. He works easily 30 miles away and whenever he manages to be "in the area" he calls me up for lunch. I'm charmed by it!

I'll be PC-free this weekend and hating it. He's spending Friday, Saturday and Sunday at his old house watching his kids while STBX is off on a cruise. I know he's looking forward to the time with his boys, but I still feel a bit creeped out at the idea of him sleeping in his old bed in his old room in his old house surrounded by his old life. Besides that, I'll just miss him!

I'm planning to use the time well, though. Some errands, some fun time with SG and relaxing. With any luck, the weekend will just fly by...

I continue to feel more and more relaxed with PC and happy all around. I have no idea if it's by design or just luck, but it's working for me right now. I'm not worrying or stressing or looking for problems at the moment and things have been on a really even keel for the entire week. I'm beginning to feel a completely new sense of "well-being" that I don't know if I have ever experienced before. This feeling like things are taken care of and everything is just right.

It feels kinda good!

The only possible anxiety I can dream up is one I feel powerless to handle. STBX. I'm not worried or anything like that, but a part of me does wish that I could come to some sort of a resolution with her that would make everyone's lives easier. From what I understand from PC, she no longer "blames" me for the divorce (a good step). I want to eventually get to a place with her where we can co-exist in peace. I want her to be able to leave the kids with us when she needs a break or has plans without it being a huge complicated deal. I want PC to be able to relax and not feel like a sirloin standing between two tigers, wondering which woman he's going to annoy/piss off/hurt/offend today.

Any suggestions? Or should I just leave it alone?

Posted by Red :: 11:47 AM :: | ---------------------------------------