Wednesday, August 31, 2005

Wednesday's Rollercoaster

It's been a day of ups and downs.

Within the first hour at work I had been under siege with people storming into my office to vent and challenge my opinions. One co-worker was so furious at the 3 Musketeers leaving yesterday that she said "...and YOU want to pin your hopes on those three?"

I admitted I did. I defended my choice. I felt they had been overwhelmed and needed the break and while it was a horrible day, I stood behind them. Beyond being all too fully aware of their capabilities for success, I personally adore all three of them. In the end, the co-worker backed down and even apologized.

By 10 am, I had been run down. I went back to the pit where PlayBoy and Gman (the 2nd Musketeer) sit and just sat quietly trying to regain composure before I could get teary-eyed. I got the support I needed and felt better.

I have noticed a chill with PlayBoy that perplexed me. He's been outright avoiding me and cool when we talk at all. I questioned Dgirl (the 3rd Musketeer) and she insisted I was way off base. She told me that during the drunken festivities of yesterday I was the prime subject of conversation to such a point that she began to feel small and she kept saying "Why don't you just call her?"

She even surmised that both might have a crush on me.

Wait. What? Me?

I don't think she's right, but it did fluff my ego just a little. I wouldn't mind believing that. It's been a long time since I felt like a pretty and interesting girl. Mostly I just feel like a workaholic, chaotic, emotional trainwreck.

Moving on, I worked late tonight to catch up and even now I sit here alone in the office, trying to wrap up. EH is coming to pick me up and I'm ready for R&R. I got 2 new bootleg DVD movies today (The 40 Year Old Virgin and Must Love Dogs) and I'm looking forward to crawling into bed and watching one of them. Yes, I know it's wrong. I even feel just a little guilty, but I never claimed to be the Queen of Morality. If it makes you feel remotely better, the quality is usually so-so and I'll find a way to repent. It's not about saving a few bucks at the theater so much as it is taking a few hours to relax at home enjoying a new release movie. I know, I know...you think less of me now, don't you?

I have a plan for tomorrow that's a bit on the sneaky side. I asked PlayBoy and Gman to lunch. I'm going to bring a surprise guest...Best Friend M. Best Friend M is not only a genius in our industry, but could be a very valuable person to them. I know CB will HATE M's involvement, but I'm just going to make an introduction and see where destiny leads us all. I'm a traitor to admit that M could seriously enhance our future success, but it's a fact...

Work has officially overrun me. I don't remember the last time I had sex, but I suspect it's been a long while. I know it's been more than a week. I'm not even sure I care at the moment. Like I said, I feel like a mess of a human immersed in work and not very much like the pretty/sexy goddess I usually like to imagine I am.

Still...it's hump day, right? Maybe I'll get a little lucky and reset my head.

One last thing...did you know how much I adore you? Somehow it soothes my soul to ramble here and see that about 100 of you read my drivel a day. Some of you even comment and it's nearly always supportive. Somehow, just knowing you're here is like a visit from a friend.

We need a Blog convention to meet, don't you think?

Posted by Red :: 7:09 PM :: | ---------------------------------------