The Odd Wife


Tuesday, August 02, 2005

If the Name Fits...

A moment ago, I walked out of my house, grabbed the car keys and drove away. Moments later, I returned, raced into the house past a baffled EH, threw a can of beer on the couch and darted into the bathroom. When I emerged a moment later I went straight to the coin jar, dumped a huge handful of coins into it, proceeded to the kitchen, popped the beer open, poured half into a pot and yanked up my blouse and bra, turned to EH and held out the beer with a "Ta-Daaaaaaa!"

It's probably pretty hard to keep a straight face for my poor husband. He didn't even bother to try.

It makes perfect sense to me. I wanted to make cheese fondue for work tomorrow, needed a single beer. So I ran to the corner store, bought a single can. On the ride home, my stomach began to rumble as some part of dinner didn't quite agree with me. Upon parking, I dug the gigantic wad of change from our doorjam (I've been meaning to bring it inside and add it to our jar) and raced for the bathroom. I didn't want to drop the change, so I brought it with me, did a one-handed bathroom stint and emerged to add the coins to the jar. (I'm sure EH must have wondered if I was now shitting money...) Next, I entered the kitchen, took what beer I needed and (remembering EH's joke about men's basic need being 'a beer and to see something naked') I bared my breasts and offered him the rest of the can.

This isn't normal? EH assures me it's not.

Posted by Red :: 10:50 PM :: |
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