Friday, November 04, 2005

The Stroke of Midnight

My bp is 222/132 - the highest I have seen it and honestly, now I am worried. I'll be making a dr.'s appointment come Monday. I just need to get this move completed.

The Billy Idol concert was okay. I had trouble enjoying it. EH and I are still not connecting and the tension between us seems to be mounting. During the concert he became very possessive, which is unusual for him, and was so "grabby" that he was pushing me around more than the slam-dancing strangers. One guy was joking with me about how we kept getting bumped into each other and we kidded that we were actually dancing. Within moments, EH pushed between us and gave the man a withering glare. The man asked EH if I was his "girlfriend" and EH said "No" in a cold way and turned his back.

Gman got properly plastered and I had to lug his gigantic, sweaty frame to the car under the guise of walking arm in arm. He must weigh 280, so it was no easy task.

Stress at work is high. Stress at home is high. I don't see any of it going away anytime soon, but I really need to get into my OWN bed tonight.

We're leaving tonight to go grab our beds and put them in the new condo. I'll try to post pictures soon. I'm so excited...I love this place. I really do...

I have this awful suspicion that this weekend is going to be a bad one. Call it a premonition.

I really appreciate all of the encouragement from you all, but the truth is - I don't deserve it. I'm bound to let you down, bloggies. I won't mean to, or want to, but it's coming. I think the wheels of change may be starting a turn.

I just hope it's the right one.

Posted by Red :: 4:20 PM :: | ---------------------------------------